It’s Mother’s Day, and there has been various posts all over social media of people praising and berating their mothers. The internet is a cruel place. I wanted to write a piece. Like to hear it, here it goes!
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A mother is supposed to be warm, kind, soft, forgiving, nurturing, selfless, and loving. That is not always the case. They are not unicorns. They are not one dimensional. They have soldiered many wars. And many times live with the scars.
There are lies told to children through books and television about how our mothers will be. Your mother will not be a June Cleaver, or Claire Huxtable. Sometimes she is Sethe- living in the wounds of her past. Hating you and loving you simultaneously, beloved. Or she may not see you at all, clipping your wings and throwing you from the nest leaving you and your prayers in the wind.
Chances are the world was not fair to her. It brought about survival in her. The survival that would be passed down for you to live in that same world. Maybe you were the husband’s prize and now the mere sight of you reminds her of the man she once loved but now causes her so much pain. Ugh, you look just like yo daddy. Passive aggressive insults.
She had to move on toward her future but her past is still in tow. History repeats itself, decade after decade, man after man. She is a woman, not just a mother. She has needs- romantic love, intimacy, companionship. Mama gotta have a life too! Irregardless, you will still need her, crave her womb, want to be coddled, serenaded, lulled, protected.
Exodus 20:12 tells us that we should honor our mothers. So, we should in all of their imperfection, pain, and malevolence because we may one day fill their shoes and carry their burdens.